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Go where people like the same things you like. social groups or meet-ups; be a worker bee in a cause you believe in; get involved in political parties.

I did exactly what Bayard advised and messaged her on Instagram.

We met a handful of times over the years and she casually always invited me to them at a yoga class. Tessina, a California psychotherapist also known as "Dr. I felt ready to hear what Bayard had in store for me and tl happy to know that there were only three challenges she wanted me to tackle over the next month to help me make friends. Happy people attract people.

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Start there. social groups or meet-ups; be a worker bee in a cause you believe in; get involved in political parties.

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Bite the bullet and try online dating for a big pool of potential candidates, Schwartz added. I told her I almost canceled our session out of pure shame.

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Who are the people you sometimes see at the same parties and share mutual friends, but never have one-on-one conversations? Go where people like the same aand you like.

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She advised me to send that person a message on Instagram asking them to get coffee. All my friends are married with.

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The first thing Bayard advised me to do was take inventory of people I know and who they know. Like yourself and like your life — really work on that, Schwartz advised. But before I did, I asked Bayard for advice on what to say.

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I decided to keep our epople. I wrote each challenge down and devoted at least one week to following through on them. Those with social anxiety struggle because they are in their head and second guess themselves.

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Bayard was patient and listened to me vent. Wherever you are, be present and look around the room to see who is looking at you.

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Most people, I thought, make friends without a strategy or game plan. Look up from your phone.

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